Saturday, July 24, 2010

Ultimate Weapon Deployed

Determined to have peace and security, Parktown Officials today announced the deployment of the X-47-SL Ultimate SecondLife Security Weapon.

Boyd Doghouse and Dr Mortimer Hoof install the X-47-SL
device on the border between Hanja and Parktown.

A combination device developed by Dr. Mortimer Hoof (using alien Gurbux technology), the X-47-SL listens to, orbits, and if necessary kills avatars.

With an effective range of 9,000 meters, the X-47-SL not only listens to and records all private and local chat communications on SecondLife, it also picks up all communications sent by MSN, Yahoo, AIM, Skype (including video conferences), Tiny Chat, Facebook and Email.

With special attention to the ever-present threat of invasion by drunken Scotsmen, the X-47-SL can orbit any drunken limey to a height of 11,000 meters almost instantly. Benevolent Scottish person, Jasmine Hancroft agreed to get drunk just so we could test this function of the weapon.

Although Linden Labs allows users of SecondLife to have up to five alternate accounts per household, Parktown Officials considers this a particular threat and designed the X-47-SL to detect all alts ever used by a SecondLife avatar, as well as picking up any accounts or screen names they might use on WoW, EVE, IMVU and Steam.

In the unlikely event that all else fails, the X-47-SL can guarantee the security of Parktown Residents by detonation (as a final option) killing all avatars in a 29,000 meter radius. We have made arrangements with the Lindens to test the detonation option next month, with test sights in Ahern and Waterhead.

The device is programmed to begin playing music by Swedish Supergroup Abba 30 seconds before detonation, so if you hear Abba in SecondLife, RUN LIKE HELL!


  1. OOOoooOOOOO "DOCTOR" Mortimer!!!!!

  2. apparently he's a physicist. The German accent should have been a tip off.

  3. Firstly Boyd I am always happy to assist with worthy scientific research if that means I have to drink myself silly so be it.

    On a more serious note I wonder if on reflection this blog and others have crossed a line. The claims and counter claims whilst very interesting and no doubt a joy for the gossipmongers amongst us are becoming increasingly nasty and cruel.
    I enjoy visiting hanja - I love the mix of people; the banter; the arguments; the downright ridiculous - lets face its not well suited to the thin skinned or squeamish amongst us.
    In the interests of hanja and the people who visit (lets face it the atmosphere has become a tad caustic)perhaps now is the time for quiet reflection.
    Otherwise where is this heading? A continuous game of tit for tat, stone throwing, name calling and stamping of the feet.
    Maybe its time for everyone to GROW THE HELL UP.
    Just a suggestion

  4. unfourtunatly I cannot comment on caidence,s post on the hanjism blog,not having any of the web accounts needed to,but have to say Hallehlooooya at last someone willing to put their head on the line and talk some sence. I do not have a blog (although blamed for one) and I have no idea if my RL pictures or info have been used in any, I dont care Ive never hid behind my AV,last night though i was sent rl info on someone that went way over the line, and suprised me that this could be found so easy after informing the party involved of what info was given to me I googled my own rl name, scarey stuff enough info to not only harm me but also my children if wanted.
    Hanja used to be a fun place to be its what set us apart from ahern or waterhead we were a familly and like rl had our fall outs and threw some mud but I have never seen anything quite as spiteful as whats happening now. and to quote Jas everybody has to GROW UP

  5. Its ironic to think caidance has posted a blog about the hanja nastiness when it was boyd and the rest of her 'group' that started it off in the first place with a blog and disrespecting people.
    Dont dish out the dirt if you cannot handle the consequences .

  6. Dear Anonymous,
    I had nothing to do with these blogs and don't appreciated being dragged through the mud with everyone else. If ya'll want to play your games, that's fine. This was my plea for all of you to regain some common sense and stop. Leave me out of it and be on with your lives, blurring the lines between SL and RL and reality and fantasy. I want no part of it. You could also be less ironic by not posting anonymously and IM me in-world. From the very start I thought this was out of hand and I simply thought this blog post was funny in the ridiculous sort of way. I hope you are all satisfied with what you have accomplished thus far with all this nonsense... however it remains unclear what that is.
    Take care and peace out,

  7. You might not have commented in the blogs but you certainly dish out the crap in hanja.. i have listened to you and your so called friends attack many people including most recently elouise. When theres four or five of you attacking just one person like elouise or nero dont you think there is something wrong in that?
    Why you think your so innocent is beyond me.. hypocrytical bullies the lot of you and you deserve to be dragged through the mud because like i said.. dont dish it if you cant take it.!

  8. I have to concur with anom here Caidence, even though you have been the bigger person now and trying to put an end to this,you were never really the innocent party. Only last night gmt. i witnessed you boyd and quinby tp to leslie and continuly follow her around hanja playing stupid childish gestures, when i questioned this I was then subjected to the same. followed by insults. chaffing? prescription advice and comments about alcholholics all came from your AV among others.As much as i would like hanja to get back to some sort of normality that will never happen if we All dont admit and say sorry when it is due.

  9. This blog post was meant to be a satirical comment on just how absurd things have gotten. Claims about my ability to read IM's and the like are just ridiculous so I decided to make light of it.

    The first post about the alts was in response to ziggy following her obsession with shazz and glurp all the way to the OS grid and harassing them there. I went myself and checked out the information and I assure you it was true.

    That was really all I have to say about the situation and have no plans on making further posts on it.

    I may continue writing about stalking and harrassment in general though, because it's happened to me three times with people from secondlife. One even went so far as to call me both at home and at work.

    The other blogs, I have no idea who's writing them and I don't much care. I thought the bit about ziggy being my concubine was funny so I put it in my profile picks to match hers.

    If they want to continue writing about me every day, I really don't care. I wish they would stop posting about shazz though. It's a bit incongruous to say you're not obsessed and stalking someone and then continue this way.

  10. I missed the part about young girls "firing my bullets". I'm pretty sure if I ever tried to tell Quinby what to do, she'd do just the opposite just to spite me.

    I've seen Eloise attack Quinby and others before and if they decide to bite back, what does that have to do with me?

    Your use of the term "despot" suggests that I either rule or want to rule something which is absurd. There are some people who I wish would control themselves, but as for me controlling them, I really couldn't be bothered.

    I've had people ask what my plans for Hanja were now that Glurp is gone and how absurd is that? I have no plans for Hanja and never have.

    If the Lindens decide to sell the land, I would be interested in acquiring it but that's not the same thing and not something they've said they were going to do anytime soon.

  11. Hmmm OK first of TY for defending me I think? but I have never needed it and its best not to get involved in this crap. Secondly Ive already spoken to Boyd privatly about this and We are cool,no need to drag it all back up. And finaly as far as Qunby is concerned who really cares if she has taken a dislike to my Av, not like she has ever actualy had a conversation with me apart from the time I called her ladyboy and then said sorry perhaps she just dont like clowns. Every regular In hanja know I dont take sides I have no best friends I am as likely to stick up for nero as I am Boyd depending who is in the wrong, but they also know I dont hold grudges if ive stepped over the mark I am always big enough to say Sorry. Thats the last I have to say on this matter apart from read my profile the link was added before Caidence made her plea for normality but I think I shall keep it in if only to remind people whats really important in life.


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